Unintentional Restrictions
A teaching tool for noticing the everyday restrictions that aren't always named, and sitting with the harder question: why is restriction so often where we start?
Before we begin
Restrictions are not benign. Even when no one intends harm, restricting someone shapes their life. It limits what they can do, when they can do it, and how much say they have in their own day.
Most unintentional restrictions come from routine, risk aversion, staffing constraints, or "this is how we've always done it" — not from a conscious decision to restrict. This tool isn't about catching anyone out. It's about noticing.
The most important thing this tool will ask you to sit with: restriction should be a last option, not a first one. This walk-through helps you notice when that order has been reversed.
Set the scene
These details just help you focus your thinking. Nothing is saved or shared — every selection stays on your device. All clicking, no typing.
Which type of restriction?
Pick the category most relevant to what you're thinking about right now. You can walk through the others later.
Tick the items you're noticing in this person's situation, or that you want to investigate further. Your ticks stay on this device.
Before we go further — why?
Before we run a 5-principles check on these restrictions, stop here.
The 5 principles aren't about whether to restrict. They're about how to manage the restriction we've already landed on. That means before we get there, we need to ask: why is restricting our first port of call?
The work in this step is in the noticing. Don't rush to answer. Sit with each prompt.
Bookmark the ones you want to sit with longer. The star is just a marker for you — no one else sees it.
The 5 principles
Now — having sat with why — work through whether the restriction is justified to keep existing in this person's life. These aren't a checkbox. They're a test of your thinking.
For each principle, mark your current sense: yes, not sure, or not really. This is for your thinking — nothing is saved.
How to bring this up
If you've spotted a restriction worth investigating further, the next question is how to raise it with the people involved. This is delicate work. Most people implementing unintentional restrictions are well-meaning. The goal isn't to call anyone out — it's to slowly shift what gets noticed.
Click each section to expand the suggestions. Read what fits your situation.
- Lead with curiosity, not correction. Most families have never had words for what they're doing.
- Acknowledge the load they're carrying. Restrictions often emerge from exhaustion, not malice.
- Ask what they were trying to manage. They may name a need that has other solutions.
- Avoid "restrictive practice" as a label early on. It can sound clinical and accusatory. Start with what the person experiences.
- Name what you're noticing, not what they're doing wrong. "I've been wondering whether we're the ones who need to flex here" lands differently from "you're using a restrictive practice".
- Make it about the person, not the procedure. "What does this look like from their side?"
- Be ready for "we've always done it this way". Ask what would change if a new person joined the team next week.
- You're allowed to ask why. You're allowed to ask what was tried first.
- If you've been told to do something that feels restrictive, you're not the only one who needs to think about this. Loop in your supervisor.
- Documenting your concerns is not betrayal. It's the start of change.
What you've reflected on
You walked through one category of restriction, noticed the kinds of things that often happen without being named, sat with why restriction is so often the first option, ran the 5 principles, and thought about how to raise this conversation. That's the loop.